TRUST = PEACE

I wanted to share something with you, that I didn't understand when it happened. It was about 7 years ago in Del Rio, Tx. I was there for the summer do mission work with my partner named Lauren. That summer God really did a work in me. I went thinking I would "give up a summer." And in reality, I didn't give up anything b/c God blessed and taught me so much about Himself. And still is. . .7 years later.

I remember struggling with trusting Him with everything. I was scared, about what the future might hold. But I wanted to trust Him, the way a little girl trusts her father when he throws her in the air. She knows he will catch her when she falls, she isn't scared, b/c she knows she will land safely in his arms. I remember thinking, "Lord, I want to trust you like the little girl."

It was during that summer, that God taught me to forgive myself and to trust Him. One night I was lying in bed, and I couldn't get this "vision" out of my head. It was no longer the little girl being tossed in the air by her father. It was me, all grown up, walking with Jesus, hand in hand. As we walked, we just looked at each other. I didn't know what that was about???? I remember telling me roommate, and she said after some thought, "It sounds like peace."

And it wasn't until I wrote the last blog and was reading over it that it clicked! It was a picture of peace. As if God was saying, "When you come to me and trust me, you will have peace in your heart. It was the kind of peace that you get when you trust HIM, and not in your own ways. And that when you trust HIM-you are free to just BE with Him. What a love story! How God wants us to meet with Him, and how He sweeps us off our feet when we do! It was after that summer that I decided to trust God with my future with Larry-knowing that I could not control our future but that I could trust that God would be with me the whole way, walking with me, holding my hand. Now that's PEACE! Thank you Lord!

Swept Off My Feet

Last week I shared about "the jar." How God was just blessing me all week long, speaking to me, encouraging me, in ways that just had me speechless, or laughing out loud. It was then that I realized. . .I had been doing it my way.

I went to a retreat on Saturday called, "Refresh, Refuel, & Re-energize." I sat in awe, b/c the things that were being said was what God had been teaching me. It's not about what I do for Him. . .but about being WITH Him. God is saying, "Stop trying to figure and work everything out. Just come to me. . .love Me!" Matthew 11:28-30 says "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

I am learning that TRUST brings PEACE. When I'm trusting in Him to answer, I am recognizing who is really in control. And I am happy to say, that He has showed me amazing things again this week. Every day, it just gets better and better. He hears me, He knows me, He had been waiting all along for me to just come and sit in his lap. Now, there is no other place I'd rather be than to be at His feet. Lord your love is OVERWHELMING!

Catch and Release. . .A week of miracles!

During the Christmas break, I began to look back at 2008 to see what God had been teaching me. I found a pattern. It was a pattern of me trying to do things my way, in my timing, on my own. It wasn't until I was at the end of my rope, crying out to God, that He helped me realize something. "Catch and Release."

There's a song out by Casting Crowns called "Slow Fade." For me, the concept applied. It was a slow fade from where I trusted God for everything, to doing things myself-being self sufficient. When did this happen??? It wasn't overnight! It was a slow fade, so slow that I didn't realize it until I was desperate. Worries, and doubts/concerns enter our minds all the time. They can drag you down so fast and easily. That's when I knew that I had to release them as soon as I "caught" them.

So, I got a jar. I wrote down all of the things that were on my mind. My prayers that I did not want to even try to fix myself. I wrote them down, and I put them in the jar. "God, they're yours. . . I'm leaving them with you-it's out of my hands."

And boy did He blow my socks off! Each day from Sunday to Sunday-God encouraged me through people, new ideas, pastors, loved ones. God was showing me how much he loves me! He opened my eyes to a different way. I was like a little kid again, sitting on the edge of my seat. . . waiting in anticipation for the next day. . . wondering what God would do next. Here are a few of those miracles:

Sunday:listening to sermon-got a great idea for our next newsletter. Also, a friend from church invited us to come speak at her bible study. Answer to prayer: Guidance in our support raising.
Monday: Encouraged by friend over phone regarding support-kept getting goose bumps during the conversation
Tuesday-Saturday: Continued answers to prayers. Not just 1, oh no. . . God was encouraging me all the way around!

After you experience a week like that, you never want to even consider going back to the way you were doing it.

So my encouragement to all of you- Catch and Release- Get a jar baby!

seeing God move-larry

It is really cool to look back and see how God has moved through our lives. I understand now why people say to keep a journal. Most people know my passion is to work in radio ministry and it seemed to me like God wasn't listening to me. When I look back I see that God was saying be patient.

I wanted so badly to be an on-air dj at a Christian radio station. Along the way God gave me some little nuggets to make me happy as a way of saying hold on... but I didn't see it like that at the time. After college I got to do some voice-over work on a few commercials. Then I got to be a guest dj for one morning at a Houston radio station. Then my friend Pete asked me to put together his radio program. It is mostly his sermon that I edit and add an intro to each week and send to a few radio staions. But all these were God's way of saying hold on. Now I get to be a fill-in dj at KSBj (christian radio station) when the regular dj's take a day off.

I always thought God wasn't listening because things were not happening when I wanted. But I know now God was saying wait, it will happen in MY timing. Be patient. So now I know God has us in a place where he wants us and when he wants us. Amanda and I are ready to be in Ecuador to work with HCJB Global now. But we know HE has us where we are right now for a reason. And HE is saying be patient. In the mean time he is giving us nuggets to make us happy. Like each time we get a new supporter. Or when we see how close we are to having part of our out-going expenses paid. So I don't know when we will go... but looking back on what God has done I know it will be in HIS timing.